Pop quiz: How well do you know 2007?

2007 was a year of odd couples in the news.

In January the city saw an inferno at an apartment building that left hundreds homeless and days of subfreezing temperatures that made water from the fire hoses freeze 5 feet thick. City and county governments pleaded poverty while spending money on the darnedest things. And the region’s most unlikely pair, Ted Haggard and Mike Jones, just couldn’t stay out of the headlines.

How well do you remember the year’s news? Take our quiz and find out.

1. During one of the snowiest winters in recent memory, when blizzards struck almost weekly, which of the following was NOT a real headline in The Gazette?

A. Hard to grin and bear it when your teeth won’t stop chattering.

B. Come on, enough is enough.

C. What have we done to deserve this?

D. All of the above.

2. After January storms pummeled the region, why did eight National Guard helicopters, a C-130 cargo plane, and two F-16 fighter jets take to the air over Southern Colorado?

A. To round up illegal immigrants, who, one immigration official explained, “can’t run when the snow is this deep.”

B. To drop hay for cattle stranded in the snow.

C. To film aerial footage for the Colorado Tourism Office, which wanted to promote the ski industry.

3. Who are Tinkers and Elmo?

A. Two cats the fire department initially refused to rescue from the ruins of the Castle West fire because it was unsafe, then later rescued after public outcry.

B. Two cartoon characters local Christian anti-gambling group The Saviors invented to get kids to help teach their parents that “God doesn’t play dice.”

C. Two people dressed as “fun, lovable dinosaurs” that the Colorado Dept. of Transportation briefly hired to stand near Cimarron Bridge and wave away vehicles that were too large to fit.

4. After New Life Church Pastor Ted Haggard resigned amid a gay-sex scandal, what did church leaders do with a strapping, muscle-bound bronze statue of an angel called “The Protector” that many chided as homoerotic imagery?

A. Renamed it “Bruce.”

B. Left it in place as a reminder for fellow Christians to accept man’s many contradictions.

C. Replaced it with a simple cross.

5. How much did cash-strapped El Paso County pay to produce a 36-page “strategic plan” on how the region could improve by 2011, that included advice such as “work as a team” and “do things better” but was utterly devoid of specifics?

A. Nothing. The report was a project by local sixth-graders.

B. $16,000

C. $26,000

6. After several students experienced shortness of breath, dizziness and heart palpitations, what did three local high schools ban in February?

A. Prayer groups

B. Spike energy drink

C. Bluetooth wireless cell phone headsets.

7. Mike Jones, a former gay escort who allegedly had sex with former New Life Church Pastor Ted Haggard in 2006, made news in 2007 for which TWO reasons.

A. Jones’ book, “I Had to Say Something: The Art of Ted Haggard’s Fall,” was picked for Oprah’s book club.

B. Jones listed the purple massage table “where it all happened” on eBay, receiving bids up to $1,275 before the auction Web site pulled the item.

C. Jones claimed he also had sex with Idaho Sen. Larry Craig.

8. During the annual St. Patrick’s Day Parade in March, why did police brandish stun guns, break signs over their knees, drag people out of the street and arrest seven parade marchers?

A. The drunk, unruly crowd had started throwing bottles, injuring several people.

B. A registered group was wearing peace T-shirts and holding “kids not bombs” signs in violation of parade rules.

C. A group of “radicalized, violent” anti-war demonstrators rushed from the crowd and tried to handcuff a group of ROTC students from Wasson High School while yelling, “It’s a crime to militarize the youth!”

9. Why did Colorado Springs resident Alexander Craig call 911 more than 10 times in three hours in March?

A. He was drinking and driving, and called to taunt the police with lines such as “I’m hammered, come get me!” until he was captured.

B. He was angry over people running red lights near his house, and called each time he spotted one.

C. He had accidently shot a 6-inch nail into his skull and kept calling because no ambulance had showed up.

10. How was Colorado Springs resident David Ortiz killed during an argument outside of a pool hall in May?

A. He smashed a neon “open” sign with his fist and electrocuted himself.

B. He spit on the ground in rage during the fight, then slipped on his own spit and cracked his skull.

C. He removed the clip from a gun he was carrying, handed the gun to a man he was arguing with, and dared him to shoot. The man killed Ortiz with a bullet accidentally left in the chamber.

11. The El Paso County district attorney’s office dramatically increased its use of what crime-fighting practice in 2007, making up more than half the state’s total occurrences?

A. Specially trained “interrogation dogs”

B. Wire taps

C. No-knock warrants

12. Olympic gold medal wrestler and former Colorado Springs resident Rulon Gardner has walked away from an astonishing number of potentially deadly accidents. Which one happened this year?

A. He crashed a small plane into Lake Powell, swam through 40-degree water, and spent the night on an isolated beach before being rescued without injury.

B. He was shot by an arrow.

C. He collided with a car on his motorcycle, somersaulting and landing on his feet.

D. He wrecked his snowmobile in a creek and was stranded overnight when temperatures reached 25 degrees below zero, and lost a toe to frostbite.

MATCH THE FOLLOWING QUOTES WITH THE PEOPLE WHO SAID THEM

13. “I had some people come up and say, ‘I’ve never told anyone, but I’m Republican.’”

14. “What’s the capital of Thailand? Bangkok!”

15. “Logically, the outcome today should be unanimous. Those who support me want me in Denver to support our Republican goals. Those who detest me should vote for me to get me out of the county.”

16. “There must be a special place in hell for these Privatizers, Charterizers and Voucherizers. They deserve it!”

17. “Everything the police did was justified, and there was probable cause for an arrest, but getting a conviction is another story.”

A. High school basketball coach Gregory Burr, who was charged in January with 39 counts of sexual assault for repeatedly throwing basketballs at his player’s crotches, but only convicted of one count of misdemeanor assault.

B. City Attorney Patricia Kerry, who in November announced all charges would be dropped against seven peace protestors arrested during the St. Patrick’s Day Parade, even though she thought they were guilty.

C. State Rep. Mike Merrifield, who resigned as chairman of the House Education Committee after his comment.

D. Colorado Log Cabin Republicans chapter president Adam Crowley, during Denver’s Gay Republican Convention in May.

E. Douglas Bruce, who won 75 percent of the vote to fill the seat of State House District 15.

18. What did Colorado Springs police identify in July as a leading contributor to homicides, even though it was linked to only one of 10 murders in the city during the summer?

A. Legalization of the once-banned alcoholic beverage absinthe, which police call “the green fairy.”

B. “Gangsta rap,” which police said “has the tendency to attract gang members, which often results in criminal activity.”

C. “Harley-Davidson culture,” which police said “encourages otherwise well-behaved baby boomers to act like a bunch of thugs.”

19. Why was Air Force Academy Sgt. Jeffrey Carlson sentenced to two years in prison in August?

A. He repeatedly made advances to young, female cadets, despite being head of the academy’s sexual harassment task force.

B. He was caught with Ecstasy, despite being the head of the academy’s drug-abuse prevention program.

C. He was charged with cruelty to animals, despite heading the trained-falcon program.

20. Why did the U.S. Olympic Committee threaten to sue Olympic National Park ranger Jason Bausher?

A. The committee claimed his guide book, “Best of the Olympic Peninsula,” infringed on its right to the word “Olympic.”

B. The committee said his proposal to move the committee headquarters to the Olympic Peninsula “drastically misstated how rainy and yucky the weather is.”

C. The committee said he had stolen valuable Olympic memorabilia and hidden it “somewhere in the woods.”

21. How many bodies were dumped on Rampart Range Road in 2007?

A. 1

B. 2

C. 3

22. According to a Gazette poll in May, what is Colorado Springs’ favorite building?

A. The Pioneers Museum

B. The Broadmoor

C. The Air Force Academy Chapel

D. Any place willing to host a Trader Joe’s

23. Who is Marcus Hyde?

A. The 18-year-old who charged into Grace Church in May while embattled Rev. Don Armstrong was giving a sermon titled “Of Christian Love and Charity,” and threw a pie at the minister.

B. The El Paso County Sheriff who reacted to jail crowding by erecting a 12,000- square-foot canvas tent to house inmates.

C. One of the Tri-Lakes school board members who voted in February to be more open with the public, then refused to talk about the former superintendent’s $244,000 severance package.

24. What did U.S. Rep. Doug Lamborn say deserved to become a national monument — an idea dismissed by a committee he formed after just two meetings?

A. Pikes Peak

B. Garden of the Gods

C. Pike National Forest, which would first be renamed Reagan National Forest

25. What practice at Air Force Academy home football games did a federal audit criticize in October for wasting $175,000 annually?

A. Flying government fighters over the campus during games.

B. Keeping a trained team of peregrine falcons to perform tricks at halftime.

C. Paying for football players to stay in hotels the night before home games.

26. Which Republican presidential candidate did Focus on the Family founder James Dobson say in a private e-mail obtained by the Associated Press in September “can’t speak his way out of a paper bag?”

A. Fred Thompson

B. Rudy Giuliani

C. Mitt Romney

27. Why did 25 heavily armed special forces soldiers parachute into a prison near Cañon City in July?

A. The group had been called in to quell a riot by inmates angry over being repeatedly served “nothing but turkaloni for breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

B. The group was training, and a navigational error made them touch down three miles from their intended landing zone.

C. The group was doing outreach as part of the “Patriot Prisoners Program,” which offers to reduce inmates’ sentences if they sign up for the infantry in Iraq.

28. How many people did Colorado Springs add a day, on average, in 2007?

A. 9

B. 19

C. 90

29. When thieves in Seattle stole a van rented by Colorado Springs resident Tom Valentine in October, what did they find inside?

A. A larger-than-life toilet designed for racing.

B. The world’s largest pearl, which was stolen from a Denver vault in 2005.

C. Three white tigers illegally purchased from a Canadian animal trainer.

30. Facing severe budget cuts, which of the following seemingly wasteful moves did the city make?

A. It spent $60,000 to send bills for $0 to 35,000 residents who had already paid their stormwater fee in full.

B. It voted to spend $125,000 to make Tejon Street two ways, even though it would eliminate several parking spots.

C. It donated $407,000 to the U.S. Senior Open golf tournament at The Broadmoor.

D. All of the above.

31. In July, city code enforcement officials announced they would start cracking down on “encroachments” downtown. What did they mean?

A. An increasing number of culturally different Briargate residents who have no business south of Woodmen. They reverse the decision after shop owners complained that it would hurt business.

B. Aggressive panhandlers.

C. Awnings and signs business owners hang in public space.

32. One week after the grand reopening of the Fine Arts Center in August, museum president Michael De Marsche announced he was moving to what unlikely city?

A. Yerevan, Armenia

B. Talkeetna, Alaska

C. Nochixtlan, Oaxaca

33. Ted Haggard sent out an e-mail to media outlets in August asking for what?

A. Forgiveness, despite the fact that he had misled thousands of followers.

B. Monthly cash donations from followers, despite the fact that he earned $338,000 in 2006 and has a house valued at more than $700,000.

C. An end to bigotry, saying “true Christians should stop linking gay sex and drug use with

mmorality.”

34. What classic playground game was banned at a local grade school in August?

A. Tetherball

B. Tag

C. Jump rope

35. Four Colorado College students were suspended for two weeks in October after wearing culturally insensitive costumes at a golf outing?

A. Dressing as “townie motorists,” then carelessly and repeatedly running into other golfers.

B. Dressing in blackface and afro wigs.

C. Dressing as “golfers gone wild” and playing five holes without pants before being stopped by security guards.

DOUGLAS BRUCE BONUS ROUND

36. Who did the anti-tax crusader sue in 2007?

A. The city

B. The county

C. The state

37. What does Bruce, who was a county commissioner, demand to be called at county meetings?

A. Citizen Bruce

B. Commissioner Bruce

C. Douglas

38. Bruce ordered 5,000 of what gift for local students, only to have two districts refuse the present?

A. Small pairs of scissors with “cut taxes” printed on them.

B. Copies of the U.S. Constitution.

C. T-shirts with a mock sports team logo that read “Lil’ Tabor Terrors.”

39. How many vacant buildings owned by Bruce were on the city’s “dilapidated” list in August, accruing fines, when he admonished El Paso County to sell two well-kept, county-owned rental houses?

A. 0

B. 2

C. 5