Finding a friendly restroom tougher than it might seem

Conspicuous “Men” and “Women” signs on public bathrooms aren’t simply convenient labels for transgender people.

In some cases, the words signal danger of harassment or, at the least, a reminder of the culture’s insistence on two exclusive genders, say advocates for transgender people.

“That is the sticking point whenever people talk about trying to integrate trans people into the mainstream of the society,” said Nancy-Jo Morris, a transgender woman who lives in Colorado Springs. “The main sticking point where people fall out and say, ‘Oh no, not here,’ is when you get to the bathroom.”

The term transgender describes people whose behavior or appearance is different from the biological sex they were born with. It includes people who’ve had gender reassignment surgery, crossdressers and others. No one knows the number of transgender people, but advocacy groups such as the Human Rights Campaign estimate they make up a fraction of a percent of the population.

For many transgender people, finding a safe place to visit the restroom is a daily challenge. A 2002 survey of transgender people in San Francisco yielded reports of harassment and violence against people who entered the “wrong bathroom.”

Those concerns were part of the thinking behind several “gender-neutral” bathrooms established in Colorado Springs in recent years. Colorado College has designated several bathrooms as gender-neutral, mostly smaller facilities where one person can go in and lock the door. There are also genderneutral bathrooms at the Pikes Peak Gay & Lesbian Community Center on Bijou Street.

The Gay & Lesbian Fund for Colorado on Costilla Street took the “Men” and “Women” signs off two bathroom doors about a year ago after hearing about the effort at Colorado College. Small printed notices in the bathrooms explain the change.

“We provide all-gender restrooms so that all people visiting the Gay & Lesbian Fund building feel supported and comfortable expressing gender in a way that is natural to their personal experience,” the notices say.

Although few transgender people might use the bathrooms, workers at the fund viewed the bathroom change as a chance to educate some of the roughly 11,000 people who visit the building each year. The fund offers meeting rooms and other facilities to nonprofit agencies.

“I can’t tell you how many people have come out of the bathroom, literally, and said ‘Gosh that’s interesting. I had no idea,’” said fund director Mary Lou Makepeace. “We want people to be more knowledgable and more aware of gender issues, and as a country we’re uncomfortable talking about a lot of this stuff that concerns people who are not absolutely fitting the mold of what we think of as male and female.”

Bathrooms that accommodate people with different needs are not new. Many public places have installed “family bathrooms” for people with young children who might need supervision. Separate bathrooms for people with disabilities are available in some places. Those are sometimes a good option for transgender people, Morris said, because there’s only one user or a user and a parent or aide, and the door can be locked.

Morris said that she uses restrooms marked “Women” without giving it a second thought, and that she’s never been harassed, even though anyone who looks closely might question her gender.

The bathroom subject comes up occasionally during meetings of a group Morris runs for transgender people, called Peak Area Gender Expressions. The best arrangement for many transgender people is a one-person restroom where the door can be locked, even if it’s not labeled gender-neutral. It’s especially important for transgender people who have just begun going out publicly with the appearance of the gender they feel inside, Morris said.

“Those gender-neutral bathrooms are very comforting for transgender people who are just starting out, because they are totally nervous about going into any other bathrooms but those kind,” she said. “You have no idea how nervous a newly budded transgender person is. I mean they look this way and that way before they cross the parking lot, and not because they’re worried about cars.”

CONTACT THE WRITER: 636-0187 or perry.swanson@gazette.com