'Puritanical' not always a bad thing
In 2006, an anonymous female wrapped up what she called "years of intensive research on both sides of the aisle" and published her findings in GQ magazine. Republicans, she declared, make better lovers than Democrats. Tucker Carlson, the conservative wit formerly of MSNBC, analyzed her article and concluded that "she likes Republicans ... because they're less sensitive and they have no conscience."
Carlson was joking, but now a couple of Republican politicians are breathing new life into that description. Last week, Sen. John Ensign of Nevada admitted to having slept with an aide on his campaign staff. Then, on Wednesday, Gov. Mark Sanford of South Carolina confessed that his e-mail correspondence with a woman in Argentina had turned into an inappropriate relationship, complete with international flights and lies to explain his absence. Both Ensign and Sanford are married.
The woman writing for GQ might dismiss their misconduct as a symptom of uncontrollable conservative virility, but the voters are less forgiving, especially when the offenders claim to be social conservatives.
We all remember Rep. Mark Foley, who was in the habit of sending lurid instant messages to underage male pages, but few remember the original Congressional Page Scandal. In 1983, two Congressmen, a Republican and a Democrat, were accused of having sexual relationships with 17-year-old congressional pages. Both acknowledged that the charges were true, and both defended themselves by describing their relationships as mature and consensual. In the end, both were censured by the House of Representatives, but Gerry Studds, the Democrat, was re-elected in 1984, while Dan Crane, the Republican, was defeated.
Some might argue that the Republicans are weaker for their party's moral strictures. With Wednesday's disclosure, the Republicans lost a potential 2012 presidential contender in Sanford, while Bill Clinton provides proof positive that marital infidelity needn't stop a Democrat from winning America's highest office.
Regardless of the effects on conservative candidates, the country's political culture is stronger for the Republican Party's refusal to tolerate officials who are unfaithful to their spouses. A quick glance at Italy reveals one decadent alternative.
Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is 72 years old and, if reports are to be believed, a genetic miracle. He likes to brag that he can make love for three hours, so long as he sleeps for three hours the night before. In 2007, at the beginning of the new legislative session, a photographer with a telephoto lens took a picture of a note Berlusconi was sending two young female parliamentarians. "If you have some romantic appointment at lunchtime, I authorize you to leave!"
The photographer also captured the first line of their response: "Dear [Mr. President], we accept romantic appointments only from you."
None of this hurt Berlusconi's standing in the polls. On the contrary, Italy has always taken pride in the fact that its aging and married prime minister can carry on like a kid in his 20s. On May 1, Berlusconi was able to declare that, with a 75 percent approval rating, he was the world's most popular leader.
Two days later, reports surfaced that Berlusconi had driven into rural Italy to attend a girl's 18th birthday party.
It didn't help appearances that the girl, now known in the Italian press simply as "Noemi," is gorgeous, nor that Berlusconi presented her with a gold and diamond necklace worth $10,000. It definitely didn't help that Berlusconi's wife promptly announced that she could no longer remain with a man who "frequents minors."
The nature of the relationship between Noemi and Berlusconi is still unclear, but that scandal was eclipsed by another when a photographer emerged from his hiding place outside Berlusconi's vacation house. El País, the largest newspaper in Spain, quickly published seven of the pictures, most of which show an outdoor pool stocked with topless women.
One photo features Berlusconi's friend, the former prime minister of the Czech Republic, striking a pose which the Motion Picture Association of America wouldn't allow in R-rated movies. Yet El País didn't even bother to blur the offending bits.
I've heard European media describe Republican culture as "puritanical," and I'm sure Italian reporters accustomed to Berlusconi find us ridiculous for caring about Sanford's fling with his Argentine pen pal.
The Europeans are entitled to their opinions, just as we're entitled to prefer candidates who aren't liable to show up naked in Spanish newspapers. There's nothing like gazing at a naked prime minister to make a person proud of his country's puritan heritage.
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Cole, of Colorado Springs, is a writer, translator and political organizer. Readers can reach him at dancoloradan@yahoo.com.
