According to Sigmund Freud, what we’ve come to know as the Freudian Slip is a slip-up that results from the unconscious mind revealing its processes in normal, healthy settings.
So, it was interesting during Tuesday’s football kickoff luncheon when Colorado Buffaloes coach Dan Hawkins, trying to tell a joke, told Air Force football coach Troy Calhoun that Calhoun didn’t “need any more bad athletes.”
A loud groan followed a quick bit of laughter.
Hawkins quickly tried to cover his tracks by inferring the joke was about him.
But it was too late. And it’s probably a lot easier to slip up that way when you know you’re not playing the Falcons in the foreseeable future.
Air Force football fans: Don’t hold your breath waiting for a matchup between your beloved Falcons and the Buffaloes.
Simply put, but bluntly, it isn’t happening.
At least, without some act of the football scheduling gods, it won’t happen this decade, and it probably won’t happen the next either.
Air Force wants it.
CU, as it officially did Tuesday, takes the politically correct route and says a renewal of the matchup would be a great for both schools. But threatened with his life, with Hawkins present, CU athletic director Mike Bohn doesn’t want the game.
“I have tremendous respect for their program and what they do,” Bohn said. “I think it’s something that we’ve got to continue to monitor and be on top of.”
Folks, that monitoring will be about as complex as any of us monitoring the Sahara Desert to see if it still has sand.
Hey, the Sahara still have sand?
Yep, still does.
Hey, Air Force still play football?
Yep, still does.
That’s hi-tech monitoring.
For Bohn — using the aforementioned scenario, sans Hawkins — the game would be great. Air Force would send the whole cadet wing to Boulder plus several thousand fans. Folsom Field would have plenty of fannies in seats. And athletic directors always love sold-out stadiums.
But the politically correct Bohn said he and Hawkins are like-minded in this matter. And Hawkins wants as much of the Falcons as he does of Montana State.
“I’m not going to lie to you, no one wants to play” Air Force, Hawkins said. “People may politically say it. But who wants to go against that offense for one game? I was talking with Fisher (DeBerry) and he was wanting their young guys to play our young guys on a Sunday. Our young guys would line up against that triple (option) and it’d be like 100-3.”
Something Air Force fans must understand, as much as they’d hate to admit it, it’s still not cool to lose to the Falcons if your school is from a power conference. Calhoun and athletic director Hans Mueh have nothing to lose in constantly pursuing that game.
On a national scale, it’s a win-win situation for Air Force.
“I’m not giving up on it,” Mueh said.
Resort to ridiculing if you must. Play on egos.
Big bad CU will play Eastern Washington (2008) but doesn’t have the vigor to play lil’ ol’ Air Force.
C’mon.
“To some degree you can say a similar thing about the Colorado State game,” Hawkins said. “You’re supposed to win. The only way you come out of it good is if you win 50-7. If it’s close, you didn’t win. If they beat you, it’s even worse.”
In truth that game would mean more to the fans than anybody. Hawkins and Calhoun would rarely, if ever, recruit the same athlete. CU is trying to repair a national reputation and an ability to recruit nationally, too.
The Buffaloes have deals with Hawaii and West Virginia, and many, if not all of the games will be on television. Hawaii is a lucrative recruiting market, evidenced by Brigham Young, Southern Cal, Utah and several other West Coast schools.
Air Force doesn’t help any of that.
If Air Force wants to get on the playground with the Buffaloes, at this point there are two things it can do: hope somebody falls off the Buffaloes’ schedule and there is nobody else available, or the Falcons could win a lot of games and reach the level where CU mistakenly thinks it resides.